FORE: The Grass is Always GreenerWhen Golf and Proverbs Collide

Welcome back, dear reader, to another installment of Fore, future winner of the Pulitzer Prize for investigative journalism. No? How about for dramatic rhetoric? No? I’ll take it for shameless self- aggrandizement if I have to. I mean let’s be real, pride don’t take home the prize. Oooh did I just make up a proverb? Now my place in history is guaranteed. And speaking of proverbs. It occurs to me that so many can apply to golf.

Here are a few examples: A stroke saved is a stroke earned. Birdie wise and Pat foolish. A pitch in time saved your nine. Don’t count your putt before it drops. Absence makes the pars grow fonder. A bad putt catches more flies than a bad drive. A poor golfer blames his clubs. Always put your best putt forward. The grass is always greener on another course. Don’t judge a round by the scorecard. Never late is better. It’s no use crying over missed putts. Out of sight, out of bounds. A squeaky wheel finds a different foursome. And finally one that requires no adjustment: Better safe than sorry. I could keep going, but it’s time to get down to business.

Well, dear reader, by the time you are reading this, the end of another summer is in sight. Labor Day may be upon us but remember fall golf is some of the best of the year – crisp air, leafless trees and thick grass. I would have included thinner crowds but if all my readers come out to play we can fill the courses up. In Mt. Hood Golf Club news, the men’s flight and overall champions will have been determined by the time you read this, as will the women’s Ace of Aces. We will be looking forward to the last two-day club tournament of the year on Labor Day weekend. After that we still have the Presidents Cup and the Due Hard events.

We will continue to offer opportunities for the golfing public. Tuesday and Friday evenings we will continue with Social Golf in the scramble format, a great way to be a part of a winning team. On Saturday, September 6th, the second annual Welches Charity Open will be held and is open to the public. It is a scramble tournament to benefit The Lions Club and the Hoodland Senior Center. And you still have time to sign up. Then comes the Bar Wars Tournament scheduled for Wednesday, October 1st. For me, as an ex-waiter, this is my favorite event. And boy do we have fun.

Vendors for food and drink outdo themselves every year. Last year had extremely funny hecklers at the seventh tee: girls with megaphones and lawn chairs. You can imagine. Yep, a good time was had by all. So get yourself on a team or just bring a lawn chair and join the hecklers and have some fun. I know I will.

Well, that about wraps it up for this month. I’d stick around but I have to go over to the post office and see if my Pulitzer nomination accidentally ended up in the dead letter bin. In the meantime I advise you to get out and play some golf and when you do, just remember to “Hit ‘Em Straight.”